It Is Different Because I Am Different

Dear Inner Parts,

You don’t live in the past anymore.  You don’t have to be scared anymore.  I am an adult and I am here to help and protect you when you need it. 

We live in a different world now.  We have more power to make change.  We have more options than we used to.  We are no longer powerless.

Oh yeah.  Who says?  How do you know for sure?  That mean friend treated us horribly yesterday.  It was the same betrayal.  It was the same lack of empathy.  It was the same horrible treatment as the family.  It was just one more person in a line of mean bullies.  How is it different?

It is different because I am different.  I don’t have to be controlled by them.  I don’t have to compromise myself to make them happy.  I don’t have to be someone I am not.  They don’t put the roof over my head.  They don’t feed me.  If they aren’t comfortable with my boundaries, they can leave.  And if they leave, I will not die.

Oh yeah.  What about all those bad things that keep happening?  It is just like before.  There are always bad things.  They never stop.  Every time we get our feet on the ground, there is some new disaster, a new mess to clean up.  How is it different?

It is different because I am different.  I have the power and strength to respond to the bad things and make them right.  I have the ability to see myself in another way.  I am not a victim to those bad things.  I am not powerless to fix them.  I can even do things to avoid them sometimes.  But they won’t have the ability to kill my hope for a better life, a better future.

Well, what about the world?  They don’t seem to care about me, about the children, about those who have been through horrific things.  They deny us.  They tell us to get over it.  They ignore the crimes of the powerful just like our family did.  How is it different?

It is different because I am different.  I can tell the world enough is enough.  I can join forces with others who are tired of the mistreatment.  I can fight for justice because I must be heard now.  And if I am not heard the first time, the second time, the hundredth time, I will keep going.  I don’t have to stop.  Nobody is going to tell me to stop now.

I know the world is triggering.  I get it.  There are too many people and events that look like the past.  But I am not a child anymore.  I have options.  I am an adult.  I don’t have to do what others tell me.  I don’t have to accept the criminality of predators because they are powerful.  I don’t have to be quiet.  I don’t have to be silent for one more day.  I am an adult and my voice will matter from this day forward.  I am different.  I am powerful.  And I’m not going anywhere.

Love, Me

Written By Elisabeth Corey, MSW

It Is Different Because I Am Different was originally published @ Beating Trauma and has been syndicated with permission.